I started a post about Seraphina’s birthday, one about finishing a quilt for Iain, one about how I thought I was done with blogging. Not a one of them ever went anywhere. I know that some of you have been worried and for that I am very sorry. Others have been sad or frustrated and I apologize for that as well.
I’ve been asked a number of times if I’m no longer in this space for good reasons or for bad and the frank answer is a little of each.
A few months ago we joined a homeschooling co-op. We meet twice a week for two very long days. It is both satisfying and all consuming. I think that for Seraphina it’s like suddenly having 15 new siblings. She always wants to go so desperately and when we are there it’s running from one thing to the next, all smiles for everyone. Her current favorite game is to see how outrageously she can behave before Mommy will stop teaching to reprimand her. When it’s time to leave she cries. And when we get home, more often then not, she has a complete breakdown and spends the intervening days clinging to me like an infant. It’s all mommy, all the time, making it pretty impossible to accomplish just about anything.
I’m co-leading a book club for the oldest kids (including Elijah and Iain when he has the time), where we’ve been reading the likes of Wuthering Heights and To Kill a Mockingbird. And yes, I am still not-so-secretly in love with Atticus Finch. Fun fact: I attended the 7th grade book fair as the ghost of Catherine Earnshaw after having donned a lacy nightgown of my mother’s and powdering my face white.
I’m leading a book club for the next level down, including Galen, where we are just finishing up Swallows and Amazons, even though Galen has read it before. That kiddo is a tough one. It’s hard to find an appropriate book he hasn’t read.
I teach what I tend to think of as a small, mixed age, Waldorf kindergarten type class, which Seraphina has lovingly christened her “circle time class”. I have a huge age range, with ten 1-8 year olds. I lead a circle time with dancing, singing, story telling and finger plays followed by nature crafts. We’ve made nests and nature weavings and played with snow dough, little clay pinch pots planted out with cress and more.
I’m also assistant teaching two drawing classes and helping out with a singing class. It’s a lot. With our dietary restrictions even just the food prep is an ordeal. We’ve just shifted to a much more laid back, one day a week schedule, with lots of outdoor time and most classes being done until Sept. I’ll be glad to take a step back and regroup. Of course we have a singing concert, two performances of a play, an Irish dance concert and a ballet concert, with all the associated dress rehearsals over the course of the next three weeks, so we are still keeping quite busy, but things truly do ease up after that.
This is all the hectic but good developments. Also in our world…
We were informed that Steve’s job of 14 years is moving several states away at the end of the year, and as we have made the decision not to move with it, there is a lot to consider.
Our ill little one, who miraculously and inexplicably grew well again around Christmas time, just as inexplicably began to decline again by Easter and we’ve found ourselves back in the world of long sleepless nights and seemingly endless worry. I come unmoored at these times and loose all concept of time or priorities beyond what is in front of me. I can’t even see beyond that. It’s not even possible. Full weeks just drift away without my being able to account for them.
Honestly, the only reason I am managing to finally post at all is that I’m laid up with “post vital cough syndrome”, Pleurisy (inflammation of tissue lining the lungs) and a resurgence of the RADS that hasn’t really given me trouble in over a decade. In layman’s terms: whenever I try to move about I start coughing so hard that I see stars and feel like I’m going to vomit.
As to my future here, I truly don’t know. Perhaps this post will be the catalyst that propels me back into regular blogging or maybe this will forever serve as my farewell post. I feel like it could go either way. There is so much up in the air right now that I have no idea what the future will bring.
No matter what, please know that this space and your involvement in it has been incredibly dear to me over the years. Thank you all so much for sharing this little window into our life. I’ve so enjoyed all of your comments and messages.
We will miss your beautiful posts. It’s wonderful to hear all the developments with your homeschooling group and performance art. I really empathise with your health issues and the never ending of it. I suffer every day and night with issues and can no longer blog. We spend so much time and money traveling across the state to specialists. Wishing you all the best and hopefully one day we will see you back in this space. xx
Melody, such a relief to hear from you! I know your plate is very full and you will make the right decision as to continuing the blog or not…either way, you will do what’s best for you and yours! I have enjoyed watching your family grow and mature over the years! Your photographs are amazing and your insight quite mature for a young mother! (I myself, could likely be your grandmother!) Thank you for sharing your Blessed Little Home with us! I will continue checking in on you and hope to see more posts in the future.
All the best!
Thank you so much for writing all of this – I don’t comment that often because I tend to check back every 6 months or so and read everything, but I’ve been reading for the past eight years. It’s been a joy to see your family grow and change. I wish you all the best of luck, and healing.
Dearest Melody, I have missed you! It sounds like your life has been at top speed, no wonder you’ve been absent. I am so sorry to hear about continuing health issues- I wish with all my heart for relief for you all!!
As for blogging, I am at the same point as you, it seems. I am not sure where it’s going to go either. I do miss it very much but have such trouble getting to it, and feel perhaps my time is coming to a close. I don’t know.
Either way, arranging a visit at a halfway point for our two families would be so lovely!! Because I would want to continue knowing you, and “for real” would be awesome.
So much love to you, all of you.
Melanie
I can’t begin to tell you how thankful I am for your posts. You have added beauty to my life and influenced me to create the kind of life and be the kind of mother I want to be. As someone who grew up in a troubled home I needed to see what a family could be. Your blog has touched me deeply. God bless you and your family and thank you.
I’ve been checking in with your blog for a few years now and would like to express my best wishes and thoughts for your family. Your insights into motherhood and slower, simpler living have inspired me a great deal. I’ve found books that I adore to share with children on here, recipes to try, things to knit, and I’ve loved your photographs (I am a New Englander, so they offer glimpses of a homeland that is quite far away from me). You’ve made the past few years for me a little brighter, and have given me a great deal of inspiration (I started knitting again because of this blog). I hope that things fall into place in a way that best meets your family’s needs and I thank you for sharing a bit of your life with us readers.
Hello fellow homeschooling family! <3 I adore reading your posts and will surely be thinking of you – it is a lovely thing to know your beautiful family is in this world making a difference. You will always be a part of our family in a small way – my first real (non-dish cloth!) knitting project was your gnome hat, I made one for each of my children – thank you for your generosity in sharing your pattern! Many blessings to you and yours from WA state.
Thanks for the update Melody. Like everyone above I send good wishes to you and your family. I love to peep through the window into your world, which is so different from my own, but quite understand that life moves on and priorities change. I hope life steadies to a more manageable pace and that everyone stays well and wish blessings on your little home whatever you decide to do.
So glad to see that you’re doing alright (mostly)! I’m sorry to hear about the illness but I LOVE seeing all the art you’re producing. And of course, the beautiful children are always great to see. I sent you an email a week or so ago with much longer comments and a question. I hope it went through.
I hope your summer is full and fun and maybe relaxing too!